Saturday, May 3, 2008

The Princess and the Laundromat (based on a true story)

Once upon a time, the Little Princess' washing machine broke down. The washer was not to be repaired for several days, and the Little Princess did not know what she would do. Himself came to the rescue and took the Little Princess to the laundromat.

The Little Princess had never been inside a laundromat before. Armed with two rolls of quarters, the Little Princess followed Himself into the building. He carried two, huge duffel bags filled with towels, jeans, unmentionable, and karate uniforms. He had begged the Little Princess to bring all the dirty clothes, but the Little Princess was too embarrassed to air all her dirty laundry in front of the other patrons.

Himself showed the Little Princess how to stuff the heavy duty machines with lots of laundry. There were two soap dispensers so the Little Princess poured a capful of detergent and divided it between the two dispensers. She set lots of quarters in the slots, pushed and the washing machine magically hummed to life and began washing clothes. Himself left the Little Princess to stuff two more machines while he went to the super, super machines.

When the Little Princess was done stuffing her loads, she went to help Himself. He had stuffed and filled seven machines. The Little Princess went to put the soap in the soap dispenser, but alas, the soap dispenser was on the top of the machine and the Little Princess could not reach.

When all the laundry was happily tumbling in all the machines, Himself found a National Geographic magazine and a chair and settled Himself for the wait.

The Little Princess was thrilled to see two of the washers had completed the cycle. She saw other patrons grabbing cards, emptying their wash, and wheeling the carts to a bank of dryers. The Little Princess grabbed a cart, her laundry, and a roll of quarters and found an empty dryer. She put all the clothes in the dryer, but looked at the dryer with dismay. There was only one slot for one quarter.

Mustering her courage, the Little Princess approached a patron. "I'm a laundromat virgin. How much time does a quarter buy in the dryer?"

The patron very sweetly told the Little Princess, "Eight minutes, but I find it usually takes three or four quarters."

The Little Princess thanked the patron, counted out three quarters, and fed the dryer.

Other loads were finishing so the Little Princess emptied more clothes into her cart, found more empty dryers, and fed more quarters into the slot.

About this time, Himself announced he desired a Coke. The Little Princess looked at her dwindling roll of quarters and told him to wait until he got home and then Himself could guzzle all the liters of soda he wanted.

The load of towels did not dry with three quarters, and the Little Princess had run out of change. Himself showed the Little Princess how to make change from the change maker. He fed a ten dollar bill into the machine and it rained quarters. The Little Princess clapped her hands with delight, scooped up the quarters, and fed all the hungry dryers.

When the dryers finished, the Little Princess, with help from Himself, folded all the laundry and neatly stuffed it into the duffel bags.

Himself and the Little Princess were the last patrons in the laundry.

The proprietor came to chat with the Little Princess. "This was your first time in a laundromat, wasn't it?" she said.

"How could you tell?"

"You didn't chat with any of the patrons."

"Oh, I thought you had noticed my charming deer in the headlights look."

The Little Princess was greatly relieved to see the washer repairman early Tuesday morning. He diagnosed something clogging the pump. He removed the pump and sure enough thee was a little piece of wood inside."

The Little Princess tapped her cheek with her index finger.

"Hmm, who in this household would have a woody in his pocket?"

The Little Princess' washer was repaired, and she stuffed the remaining laundry in it. She happily filled the soap dispenser which she could reach all by herself, pushed the buttons, and played with her altered book while the washer sang.

The End.


  1. Good thing for The Little Princess that Himself came along. I can't imagine how much laundry you must've had if it took 7 super, super machines and two regular machines to wash it, but you left some at home!

  2. I miss laundromats... Ya got all the laundry done in one shot. :) Congrats on new experiences! (My laundromat has a tanning bed...)