Friday, July 24, 2009

Mermaid or Whale

Got this in the mail from Iowa. Thought it was a hoot so here it is:

Recently, in large French city, aposter featuring a young, thin and tan woman appearedin the window of a gym. It said: THIS SUMMER DO YOU WANT TO BE A MERMAID OR A WHALE?¨

A middle aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym.

To Whom It May Concern:

Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sealions, curious humans).. They have an active sexlife, they get pregnant and have adorable babywhales. They have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing themselves with shrimp. They play and swim inthe seas, seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Barren Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia. Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs. They are incredible creatures and virtuallyhave no predators other than humans. They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in theworld.

Mermaids don't exist. If they did exist, theywould be lining up outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity crisis. Fish or human? They don't havea sex life because they kill men who get close to them not to mention how could they have sex? Therefore, they don't have kids either. Not to mention who wants to get close to a girl who smells like a fish store? The choice is perfectly clear to me; I want to be a whale.

P.S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that only skinny people are beautiful, but Iprefer to enjoy an ice cream with my kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver and a piece of chocolate with my friends. With time we gain weight because we accumulate somuch information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren't heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy. Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, ¨Goodness, look how smart I am.¨


  1. Are you pasting pictures of whales over the mermaids in the bathroom?