Finally 16 weeks, 14 pounds and I broke through the first mental block barrier. I had to weigh myself 6 times this morning just to make sure. I thought hitting this number would make me happier. Don't misunderstand, I am happy and lighter. It's just a lot harder and taking longer than I thought. Then there was someone this week who asked if I had lost weight. I thanked her for noticing, but couldn't help wonder how huge I must have been for her to make a comment.
When I was in my mid-20s, and needed to drop a pound or two, I wouldn't eat for a day. Not that I ate much anyway. My eating habits were atrocious. I didn't eat breakfast, just had a cup of tea. Lunch was usually a can of soda and something out of the snack machine at work. If I was travelling to a client, I'd skip lunch so I could bolt home an hour early. I did go out for lunch with the fellas I worked with or dinner out. Fast food. I was also hustling tennis games at the club where I hung out.
I've been trying so hard to follow my plan. An old WW exchange plan. 2 milk, 2 fruit, 3 or more veg, 4-6 bread, and 3-5 oz. protein per day. I also have an extra 700 calories per week (This takes care of real sugar in tea or a special treat) Roughly it works out to a 1200 - 1500 calorie diet. I try to weigh and measure. I used to write down what I ate, but now just keep a running tally in my head. It's so much work and sometimes I find my self obsessing about what I can eat next or how many of something I have left to eat. I'm also frustrated by the gain a pound, lose a pound, gain 2, lose one, plateau, my body seems to go through. I also try to walk the treadmill every morning. Half an hour at 3mph, a little over a mile and a quarter. Sometimes I play with the incline and walk up hill both ways. Today, I increased the walking speed by .2 mph. My little legs were flying!
What I really want is to "have lost weight". To have the commercial of me standing next to my beach ball before picture and me now in my cute, tight jeans. Voila! I lost x number of pounds. Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.
I think I need to find a thin picture of me. The me at the end of the tunnel. Something tangible to aim for. Me and my first car, Hubbell, a '79 Mustang. (No, I don't plan on getting down to that weight again. At 53, it's unrealistic, and I doubt I could maintain it.) Look at those tube socks, can't get much cooler than that.
What are the things you are doing to keep yourself motivated and on track?
First of all, congratulations on hitting and surpassing that first milestone! WOOHOO! Take a moment to party, girl!
ReplyDeleteI use before pictures, new jeans, visualizations of just how big a large bag of dog foot really is (that's how much I've lost so far) and chatting with a friend who is also going through the Die-with-a-T too. ;)
Gratuliere! The mental mind game is the WORST. It doesn't go away. I had no pictures of me less fat. I never was, so instead I keep a picture of me at my worst around. Next to the picture I write, "Nie wieder. (never again)"
ReplyDeleteYou're awesome!
Congrats on the milestone!
ReplyDeleteOur WW center changed scales this week. It's an upgrade, we all had to take the hit. Plus, my meeting's at 7. I usually have dinner after weigh-in but tonight I was invited to dinner before, so all things combined, I'm up .2. I'm cool with that.
To keep motivated, I don't think about the weight loss, I think about the positive changes I've made. Like tonight at dinner, I could have joined the clean plate club, but I was full so I stopped. That's a foreign concept for me!